role models

I was looking through some old copies of our church magazine, there was one article which reported on a stage item which I remember from when I first came around the church. This was a group of sisters sharing about how God had drawn them together from all sorts of different backgrounds and made them good friends in Jesus.



The thing that I noted about it was, the sister I most looked up to at the time was 35 when the article was written. That was about 17 years ago, when I was 18. This year I will turn 35, so I will be the same as as this sister who I considered "mature", "stable", "secure" and so on.

It's a bit scary to think I am now the same age as people I used to look up to when I was in my teens.
Part of me does not feel like I have been around the church that long. I certainly do not feel that "grown up".

I also wonder what I have actually achieved in all the years I have been in the church.
Or what am I doing with all the "experience" that comes with 17 years of covenant/community/celibacy/kingdom employment.?

It also makes me think along the lines "Am I living the life I claim to?", "Is the life I am living what I really want to be doing?", "Am I really achieving what I want to in life?"